How to get a referral

Every company here is easier to enter through a person than through the queue. Each page says how to find the mutual who can open that door, and what to send once you have. 40 pages.

Big tech

AI labs

Finance and consulting

Founder-led and fast-growing

Defense and hardware

When nobody replies

Most referral requests are never answered, and the silence is usually about effort rather than about you. Somebody opened your message between meetings, saw a job they would have to go and find, a form they would have to log into and a claim they weren't sure they could make, and left it for later. Later didn't come.

So run it on a week. Ask the day you find the person. Nothing back by the fourth or fifth day, and you send one short nudge that makes refusing easy. When the week ends in silence, apply directly and stop waiting: roles close faster than inboxes clear, and an application you sent yourself beats a referral you're still hoping for.

The nudge is two sentences and carries no guilt. “No pressure at all on the referral. If it is not something you want to put your name to, say so and I will apply directly today.” People answer that, because you've handed them the easy version of the reply.

If you ask a second person at the same company while the first is still deciding, tell them both. Two referrals landing unannounced is not twice as good, and the awkwardness of it falls on them rather than on you.

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